Imarablog

On friendship

I've probably posted on friendship before. I've lost track.  I've had a few things come up that have made me ponder this subject yet again. 

New Oxford American dictionary defines friendship as:

friendship |ˈfrendˌ sh ip|nounthe emotions or conduct of friends; the state of being friends.• a relationship between friends she formed close friendships with women.• a state of mutual trust and support between allied nations.
What friendship means to me is someone you trust, someone who is there for you no matter what, someone who doesn't judge you for who or what you are or what you have done, someone who accepts you for you, someone who can agree to disagree with you and guess what? You are still friends. 
I am a person who will tell you if I have a problem with you, if I feel your friendship is important to me. Because if it is important to me, then I want to fix whatever problem there is. I'm not perfect and yes I jump to conclusions just like everyone, but once cleared up, fantastic. Lets move on. I don't hold grudges. They only cause pain, stress and anger. If i'm in error I apologize and friends accept apologies and again move on. 
We all make mistakes. We all say things we wish we could take back. We all say things that maybe come across as something we never intended. We might not even be aware we've done it. Apparently, I'm at fault for this. Sometimes I say things that are misconstrued and I don't even know what I've done. It's never intentional. I wouldn't piss or lead my friends on on purpose. I jest, I tease and sometimes I flirt. All which have gotten me into trouble. My close friends jest, tease and flirt back, no harm done. We giggle and laugh. That's not always the case like I said and I've done or said things totally in fun and they have been taken seriously. If I do this with you TELL ME.  JUST FUCKING TELL ME. 
Just tell me what I've done. don't be cryptic. Tell me. How can I fix it if I don't know I did it? Once you tell me, I try to fix it as best I can. If you are my friend you will accept my apology. Don't make me beg, that's not friendship. Tell me what the fuck I did wrong and let me fix it. I don't ask much. I treasure my friends. I don't want to upset my friends. 
I've made awesome friends this past year or so and I've connected with a few past friends who have surprised me. I have two friends from my "old life" who have resurfaced and been completely honest with me and non judgmental of me and  you know what? It means more to me then you will ever know. 
This is to all my friends who have been there for me and my craziness and I love all of you. Even the one I've recently pissed off.  I'm trying to fix it. You just have to throw me a bone.  This is my public apology. 
As well as any of my other friends that I've inadvertently pissed off, please let me know, publicly or privately. You know how to reach me.

Apparently I've done it.

What "it" is. I have no idea, but apparently I've done it.

Spontaneity

Spent a spontaneous night in Reno last weekend. Drove in on a whim, booked a last minute room. When we got there we were immediately upgraded to a suite. (no extra charge) It was amazing. (I'll post pics if I still have them)

We spent some time in the hot tub and then went for a martini at the Roxy. It's a piano bar in the Silver Legacy. Pretty girl singing all my favorite Elton John and Journey songs. (heehee) I was feeling lucky after the room upgrade and had a piece of sourdough bread. I haven't had real bread in about two years and sourdough is my absolute favorite. I waited for the crushing, doubling over stomach pain and it didn't come. hmmmm. 

We headed to sushi at Harrah's. They had gluten free soy to my surprise and a very helpful bartender. The streak continues. (I guess I should have played video poker. I probably would have won) We went walking and B says "Hey, you want a tattoo?"

and I say "I always want a tattoo, but never find one I like." He dragged me in to the tattoo parlor. (no I wasn't drunk) I found  dragonfly I liked. The artist of the dragonfly said he had a client but his apprentice tattoos just like he does. I was feeling lucky still so I said sure. I let this kid decide the colors. He was dead set on green for the body. I said. "You're the artist." It took about half an hour. It hurt like hell. I didn't make a sound though and to my surprise I didn't cry. B said he was shocked he didn't hear me screaming. (cute) I came out and said I probably won't do that again anytime soon, but I'm already thinking about a second. 

Rohypnol Haze

So I had an unpleasant new experience last weekend. I was off visiting a friend and having a blast. I met some really awesome people and was enjoying socializing for once. Myself, my friend "S" and my new friend "E" decided to go Salsa dancing. (Me secretly hoping I was going to get to dance with a hot latin man)

Instead I got the short creepy guy with no rhythm who said "I teach you how." Which made me laugh. All three of us girls were pulled up on the dance floor simultaneously, leaving our drinks unattended. My rhythmically challenged dance partner kept spinning me and making me dizzy. Most likely to make me not notice the affects of what ever his friends spiked our drinks with. 

The friend I was visiting noticed two of the men hovering over out drinks and immediately went back to the table. She was suspicious. (she had been roof-ied before. I vaguely remember her taking my shot glass out of my hand and say "we are leaving." Now at this point I had only had 2 tequila shots and I was way more drunk than I should have been (I can hold my liquor) 

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